004

[fuckitybye]

[OOC: At some point during his video conference with Columbus and Claire, Malcolm is bound to discover that someone has been fucking fudging around with his laptop. So...happy April Fool's day, folks. ETA: Also, will provide on request the exact list of what the swearword substitutions are. Some are obvious. Some took a bit more creativity.]

All right, you smug fudging people. If I ever, EVER get my hands on the fiddling bottomhole quaint who fudging hacked my fudging laptop, I am going to make a fudging NECKLACE out of your fingers, you got that?

No fudging respect for other people's property, Christmas. What the heck is this crud?

Fudge it all. I'm done. You twits are getting nothing out of me for the rest of the fudging day.

[That's not true. Malcolm can't help himself and will respond when poked. He's just sulking now.]

Comments

Private-Voice.

[yourunichase]

[Have some fucking laughter, Malcolm.]

Private-Voice.

[fuckitybye]

Oh, snot you, Parker.

[Yes, he said "sod you", but Kirk's hack cleverly swaps the words as they go through the transmitter. Malc knows this by now.]

Voice.

[yourunichase]

Snot me, huh? What a charming turn of phrase you brits have.

Voice.

[fuckitybye]

Fudging leave it, all right? Some fudgewit has done a number on my fudging laptop and they're in for a right fudging kicking into the next fudging millennium when I find out who the quaint is.

BAHAHA I HAD TO.

[bubble-mobile.livejournal.com]

How absolutely lovely to hear you acting civil.

Re: BAHAHA I HAD TO.

[fuckitybye]

Go bug yourself with your fudging wand, Donna Reed.

[bubble-mobile.livejournal.com]

I do not believe bug is a verb, sir. And my name is Glinda, not Donna.

[fuckitybye]

Snot the fudge off, all right? I haven't got the fudging bandwidth to deal with your crap today.

[bubble-mobile.livejournal.com]

Oh, you. I'm sure if you ask the admiral he will surely give you more. Now, in the meantime perhaps we could engage in delightable conversation since you have already displayed such commiticism to the betterment of your language.

[kingfor-aday.livejournal.com]

...

I've got better sense than to think this is permanent. So I'll settle for being amused.

[fuckitybye]

Enjoy it while it fudging lasts, mate.

[kingfor-aday.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'm more than enjoying it. I'm tempted to take pictures, or make a photocopy.

[bubble-mobile.livejournal.com]

Oh, sir Howie. Is it not just wonderful!?

meanwhile. paddy has to end every sentence in a queen lyric.

[christ-onabike.livejournal.com]

Hey, you're fucking polite for a fucking jock today, mate - ah well, carry on, carry on as if nothing really matters.

What the fuck is going...dammit, God knows I want to break free.

[fuckitybye]

You got stuck with Queen lyrics.

HA.

[christ-onabike.livejournal.com]

Shut your fucking face before another one bites the dust.


FUCK. (ahahaha, it couldn't Queen that - you can't win with your hands tied)

...

[fuckitybye]

Count your fudging blessings, son. At least you can still use your Anglo-Saxonisms.

LOL. Kirk is dying of laughter

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

it's time to SMUG

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

Problems?

[fuckitybye]

Yeah, blooming problems. Some bottomhole fiddling around with my laptop sorts of problems.

[captain-jtkirk.livejournal.com]

And... did what? You seem pretty normal.

[fuckitybye]

Do you not notice that it seems like I got my fudging journal hacked by blooming Mary fudging Whitehouse or something?

Actually, that reference probably means sweet fudge-all to you.

D: Trying not to laugh.

[gutsofaguppy.livejournal.com]

Who did this?

[fuckitybye]

If I fudging knew, the fudger'd be hanging off the starboard bow by his toes now, wouldn't he?

[gutsofaguppy.livejournal.com]

Oh, good point.