014

[fuckitybye]

[Malc needed someone to terrorise and so he went off in search of Columbus, only to discover he's nowhere to be found.]

So has Christopher Robin fucked back off to the fucking Hundred Acre Wood, then?

Not even two months and one fucking warden already gone. This is better than my first two months in Whitehall.

Comments

[fuckitybye]

Christ. Wonder what the Barge record is for burning through the fuckers.

You're on number three, eh?

[christ-onabike.livejournal.com]

Think I might have burned them the fastest - but some people are on fucking number eight or something stupid.

Yeah. Lucky fucking number or something.

[fuckitybye]

Christ, it's like fucking DoSAC here.

Tell you the truth, I'm a little sorry to see the back of the useless little cunt. He'd only just mastered weeing in a grown-up potty, but at least if I needed something he'd get it, no fucking trouble.

[christ-onabike.livejournal.com]

I think the higher a number you're on, the worse they get. Christ, I can't fucking imagine either of the other two doing the shit Uhura's pulled.

...DoSAC?

[fuckitybye]

Fuck. Guess it's too much to hope I'll get another Gormless Wonder, then.

Department of Social Affairs and Citizenship. Those fuckers burn through secretaries the way Shaun Ryder goes through a kilo of Colombia's finest.

[christ-onabike.livejournal.com]

I got an angel who got his arse demoted to inmate for number two. I'm quite proud of that one.

...uh, isn't that the DWP. Work and Pensions and all that shit? Never heard of that department, mate.

[fuckitybye]

How's that demotion shit work? The Admiral make an announcement or something? Do the Wardens vote on it?

No, it's DoSAC. There's a sub-department as handles pensions and shit—that what you mean?

[christ-onabike.livejournal.com]

Dunno. It wasn't like it was for some shit he did here - he disappeared, came back, like... ten years into his fucking future, and was a drugged up hippy thing instead of an angel. It was fucking weird.

...Nope, mate, it's the DWP. It's fucking huge - and I should know, my entire fucking estate lives off those fuckers. In fact, half the money in my bank account's probably straight off giro checks.

Strikes unreadable

[fuckitybye]

I swear to fuck it's DoSAC that

Fuck me, what TV show are you fro

Well, that's fucking interesting, it is. What was the year again, where you came from?

[christ-onabike.livejournal.com]

First time I got here, 2009, and now? 2010.

Not many people get to die fucking twice.

And Malc concludes that Paddy MUST be fictional.

[fuckitybye]

Well, all fucking sorts of things are possible, I reckon.

psssssh. .

[christ-onabike.livejournal.com]

True enough. Good luck with your next one, mate.