fuckitybye | 014

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014

[Malc needed someone to terrorise and so he went off in search of Columbus, only to discover he's nowhere to be found.]

So has Christopher Robin fucked back off to the fucking Hundred Acre Wood, then?

Not even two months and one fucking warden already gone. This is better than my first two months in Whitehall.

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Got a bit of a fucking poetic streak have you, Swearengen?

Can't find it in me to disagree with a single fucking word.

Well, I could leave Glasgow and I fucking ruled Whitehall, so you tell me, mate.

What's your story, then? I've been answering a fair fuckload of questions, so I reckon it's your turn for the open mic.

It all makes sense now...

I've heard people suggest it before, but I wouldn't fucking presume upon my own diction.

So tell me, how long've you been here?

They can say that they just fucked off going back home, but nine times out of fucking ten, they just fucking can't deal anymore. I had one fucking warden who fucking left as soon as they were fucking assigned to me. Yeah, a little fucking hard not to take it personally.

I had fucking Barbie swan off in the middle of a fucking port.

What, they can fucking do that? Disappear in the middle of a port or whatever? Fucking hell.

Actually, what I was wondering was how often it happens that a warden says "fuck it" but stays around.

Feels like a fucking eternity, but it's more like a fucking month and a half, believe it or not.

What do you wanna know?

Yeah. Walked into the fucking woods and fucking poofed.

At least a few times. Sveta did it to Ruby, and Janeway tried to get fucking rid of me and the fucking Admiral wouldn't allow it.

Sixteen months. That's almost one warden every two and a half months.

Does it work the other way? Inmates telling the Admiral they want their warden replaced?

[Private]
I got Judas in my other ear fucking begging me to take Sexby. The fuck.

Got the fucking maths skills, I see.

I see they're really going for the fucking stability here. Who's your current warden?

Oh, you know the usual fucking speed-dating stuff. Where you from, what you do for a fucking living, all that.

If your warden's a fucking lazy fuck who never does any fucking work like Amber didn't, then yeah, it works. I've fucking seen it happen at least fucking once.

[Private]

God, Judas is such a whiny little fucking bitch. Sexby fucking does well with him, and right now he's just being a fucking... Don't do it, but fuck all, if you want a warden, you should fucking take Denise. She's pretty fucking much just like me only a fucking Doctor.

There's going to be some kind of fucking official announcement soon, yeah?

I already figured whatever Judas has fucking on between himself and Sexby, that's NoMFuP and I'm staying the fuck out of it. Think I'll see what fucking free agents are floating around in the meantime.

Fucking should be, yeah. It feels like it's fucking late, honestly, but fucking given that we were on the fucking Master's world...

NoMFuP? None of My Fucking...? Anyway, Sexby's the fucking sort of stand up guy who isn't going to fucking let Judas go without a god damn fight, which will probably be amusing as fuck to watch. I fucking hope you don't end up with fucking Claire, it feels like she's always fucking losing inmates.

Virginia, small town, very boring. And as for what I do, or did... anything I liked. I lived off the fruits of my family's labours.

Tim ~~Drake~~. The boy's a wonder.

NoMFuP: Not My Fucking Problem. Words to live by, believe me, love.

I don't think there's any fucking danger there as far as Sexby's concerned. Claire now—she's not bad, yeah? Kind of reminds me of Sam, my PA from back home. Just a fucking kid though, isn't she?

And what "labours" were those, then?

Haven't had the pleasure. I'll take your word for it.

Yeah, that was pretty much my philosophy for everything that didn't fucking have to deal with Jarod.

She tends to go through fucking inmates like fucking people change their fucking underwear. She lost the latest one in a god damn fucking week. I'd rather she didn't fucking jinx you.

He's not half bad.

[Private]
You should introduce yourself.. I wonder how he speaks with other people.

Edited 2010-04-24 21:59 (UTC)

Shall do if I get a chance, then.

He a big pain in your arse or something?

Jarod? Your fucking day job, yeah?

Yeah, I heard about this last one. Fucking insane. We'll see, I reckon.

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